Today the BF and I woke up early and went out for breakfast at IHop. We then ventured to Best Buy in search of some mystical HD chords that Ben can't seem to find that work on our TV. Whilst at the Best Buy we were looking at cameras (I found the one that I'm going to buy next week btw--can't wait!) and video cameras when Ben pointed out a $200.00 + that he said I could buy him for Valentine's Day/ 5 year anniversary. Casually I asked him, "How much are we spending on each other- how much are you spending on me?"
Just as casually he responded about $200.00 .
What's the problem with that you may ask? Well I'm about to tell you-- my friends/my family/my naive little blonde head at all but convinced me that I'm going to get a ring for this occasion. Wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong!
At first this thought just resonnated as I perused Best Buy and Ben chewed the fat with sales people but the longer I thought on it- the madder I got, so much so that on the way to our next shopping destination (DSW where I found---nothing) I told him that I think I'll move out in the spring...not that we'll break up but that I'll find my own place and then maybe he'll appreciate what he has.
Drama Queen right?!?!?!
I know--- and the poor guy just sits there stunned like wtf happened here- we had a nice breakfast, all was going well, and now she's moving out?!?! He had no idea what had gone wrong but as time passed I continued to just get more and more upset. I decide after DSW that I was done shopping with him and deposited him back at the house to go tanning- but not before going in "after my tanning lotion" AKA rubbing salt in his wounds/ fishing for reassurance.
And round and round she went:
Me: I don't want to be this girl, I don't want to live like this
He: Live like what?!?!?!
Me: With you not wanting me! I feel like I've pushed you into furthering this relationship with every step: getting serious, we only moved in together because I moved my stuff in on you 2.5 years ago!
He: That's not true! I don't want you to move out!
Me: Well I can't live here and keep giving the milk for free if your never going to buy the cow! (Why is this the only time I woman will willingly refer to herself as a bovine? Also this is the reason my mother is convinced we aren't married already--the free milk)
He: You only want to get married because you want to get married it has nothing to do with me!
Me: That's not true! (And it is soooo not true) But it doesn't help that I know more than one couple who has met, dated, gotten engaged and married in LESS than the time we've been together!
He: (Listed reasons every couple we know is going to fail...asshole)
Me: Forget it- I don't want it anymore anyway just forget it.
Then he stomps over to the computer and pulls up some ring (it was pretty by the way) and says that he hasn't asked because he can't afford the ring he really wants to get me.
Bullshit. There is financing for these types of purchases and if he really wanted to he would- just like 99% of the non silver spoon/ trust fund population- open a luxury account . I also happen to know- and this is the real kicker- that he's got a savings nest egg for a HOUSE, a FUCKING HOUSE and that savings would buy the ring he showed me several times over. I see what the priority is. Here's your sign blondie: He's just not that in to you.
At this point I had nothing else to say. I told him goodbye and trekked out onto the frozen tundra that is Cincinnati, went tanning, and indulged in some retail therapy. I've since come home and conceded to let it go for now- but wtf?!?! What am I supposed to do- I know acting like a shrill bitch doesn't help change his mind but I can't help it I'm frustrated and hurt.
Le sigh. Tonight..I drink tequila...that will at least be a temporary fix.
So what did I buy?
Glad you asked.
Bob Marely Legend. LOOOOOOOOOVE this CD. It relaxes me and just over all makes me happy ( and I need a happy maker right now). It also reminds me of the vacay to Clearwater Beach Emily and I took in 2k8.
We listened to it as we drove down the coast to Lido Beach on Siesta Key. Awesome day- awsome trip.
I bought this Cd too...especially for track # 8
These boots are a bit contraversial. Yes they are Crocs...and as a whole...I hate Crocs but I thought these were just so cute! I also apparantly wear a size 6 in Crocs they must run big...either that I or my foot shrunk a size.
Apparantly Sephora is no longer going to carry Vincent Longo so I got this lip vinyl in: Carmen (a plum color) for 6 smarckaroonies.
I initially went into Sephora to pick up Smashbox's O-Bronze but after trying it decided I would rather have their O-Gloss instead. I literally carried O-Gloss around in my basket for an hour while I played in all the Sephora goodies- until I stumbled on Nars' oh-so-popular Orgasm blush. I never thought it was my shade really but I tried it on and with my tanning bed brown skin it looks really good! Sold!
Also on sale for the close out $12 foundation? Yes please.
I saw this concealer, highlighter duo by Lorac about a month ago and thought I would like to try it so today I tossed it in my basket and headed to the checkout.
Fluidline in Blitz and Glitz.
M3 fragrance. So inexpensive at $22.00 and I love the way it smells- it reminds me of my freshman year in college and a time when I was carefree.
Love fix + makes foundation look dewey and hydrates tired or hungover skin.
I was also tempted to pick Diorshow Iconic today because Shasta at Bergdorf Blondes (among others) has done nothing but rave over it, but passed it over for now- I'm always disapointed and wind up right back with my old (cheap) stand by Cover Girl Volume Exact. Any thoughts? Has anyone else tried it and liked it? Maybe I should just bite the bullet and try for myself.
Next mall trip.
Tonight Ben and I are going out. Don't know where, don't know who with...maybe no one...everyone seems to be home bodies right now...who can blame em' though...this weather sucks but I gotta have at least a few gin and tonics to shake off the ick.
Well I'm off to shower and beautify with my new goodies to help me pull myself further out of my boyfriend induced funk.
Miss Amber Lane
Tonight I'm Feeling: Frustrated, Happy with new goodies, Antsy
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