If It Aint Broke..Don't Fix It

In 1999 I borrowed a set of hair curlers from my sister to do my own hair for my sophomore homecoming,

They were nothing special, no switches, no bells, no whistles. Just rubber hair curlers in three sizes that didn't light up when they got hot, didn'tchange colors when they were cool- they just went in your hair with little horseshoe shaped pins, stayed in for 15 minutes, then came out, leaving your hair bouncy, shiny, and curly.

I never gave those curlers back and they have worked for me- without fail for over 10 years.

Only problem is; all the bells and whistles of the new curlers with their heat up clips and their soft, felty goodness made me swoon. My curlers were missing a few pins anyway and I thought it really was time to move on.

So I packed away my trusty curlers and bought a new set with the heat up clips and the felty, cool-to-the-touch curler and thought they would work fantastically- I mean they were made 10 years are more into the future from my other curlers, with the advancement in technology they had to work 10 times better!

Nope,wrong, nuh-uh- they freaking suck.

My hair is processed to a nearly platinum blonde every six weeks - its thick and though its straight, it will hold a wave when twirled around my finger. So explain to me why a $35 set of curlers didn't so much as and a half inch of volume?!?!?


I know this all sounds really stupid- but I just had a mini melt down tearing apart our upstairs looking for my old set of curlers. I have been trying to get in with my stylist for a week with no luck first they were closed for snow, then my girl got her car stuck in a snow drift, now I have an apt. scheduled for Sat. morning but an event that I'm the host of- tomorrow. My roots are dark and noticable and my eyebrows look like unruly little catterpillars- sure I could pluck but then I wouldn't be able to wax on Sat. and then the cycle would start all over again. Being the savvy chica I am- I figured if I could roll my hair then mold it into some stylish updo adored with a flower or a bow or something that would divert attetion from my roots and I'm banking on the hope that my glasses (that I only NEED to wear for reading) will cover my Bert brows. So imagine my frustration when my craptastic curlers failed to do the trick!

When I pulled the curlers out and stared at my limp, multi-colored strands the hissy fit commenced- I had to use my old curlers- only problem is- I had no idea where I stashed them. I stormed the bedroom for a few minutes before I called Ben off the computer and demanded he help me look as I continued to stomp around with a flashlight looking under beds and in backs of closets.

"What's wrong with you?!?!" Ben asked me finally

My answer?

"I'm mad because I bought a new set of curlers that suck and my old ones worked perfectly fine!"

I said it with complete frustration and disgust then there was a moment of silence before Ben and I cracked up, I pulled my head out of my bum, and remembered where I stashed the old curlers.

They are heating to perfection as I type. Tomorrow the new curlers go in the garbage and the old curlers reclaim their throne on my vanity.

Ugh.

I'm totally over this story and this dilemma. I've learned two things from this event:

#1 Always have a standing apt. for beauty maintenance
#2 And never fix it if it aint broke

I WILL NEVER PART WITH THESE CURLERS EVER!

Grr. PMS is a hell of an ailment.

Ladies,

Goodight!

Much Love Always,

Miss Amber Lane

Santa Baby

Forget the sable under the tree

Here's the lust list 2009 - for me!

(Disclaimer: This list is completely in Amber Lane's day-dreaming blonde little brain - the author by no means expects fruition but welcomes donations of any of the following items)

( Santa - there's pretty much nothing that I would turn down in that pretty blue box!)

(This bag isn't necessarily my favorite Louis but I would take it- and I would take Scarlett as my new bff too - do you know Mrs. Ryan Reynolds Santa? )

(Yes, a bug is my dream car. Painted just like so. It may not be the height of luxury but I showed Boo this picture as I was posting it and he said to me, "yep that's exactly what you would look like if you were a car" so you see Santa- this car parked in my driveway on Christmas morning would just be an affirmation!)

This next gift is located just a few miles from our rental home Santa and is just 1.5 mil.
You needn't wrap it Santa- just a bow on the front door will do!

(Front View)

(The Foyer- Does this not remind you of the Titanic?)

(Wood paneled kitchen)

(Bedroom with cool stair case- I have no idea whats upstairs but I imagine a comfy reading room with a view of the pool....)

(or maybe a closet that looks like this and comes with all those shoes!!!)

(Did I mention the pool- I would convert the bath house to a cottage for ma mere of course!)

(I would spend everyday of the summer here)

Then when its too cold for my pool you could book me a vacation here Santa:

(Monte Carlo - yes please!)

(While your at it Santa just make it so I can be a trophy wife so that I have time away to fully appreciate all my gifts - I think Boo would appreciate this!)


(A Blank check to help me pull off my big fat pink wedding would also not go unappreciated!)

But really Santa I know we are in a recession and all so I am including a few items that may be a little more budget savvy"

(This book will keep me entertained for quite some time I'm sure)

(A gift card to a spa will revitalize me after the stressful holiday season. I know I'm not as busy as you Santa but an Activity Director's holiday season is quite jam-packed as well- caroling, cookie baking, parties...I'm just saying...)

( A bottle of this would suit me just fine)

And last but certainly not least Santa gift cards to Macys & items from our registry would be especially appreciated

My number one pick?

(Feather bed mattress topper)

I hope this list isn't too much to fathom Santa- I swear I've been a real good girl (barring a few boughs of crankiness and bombshell tantrums- it happens).

I'll be sure to leave you a plate of cookies and a tall glass of milk - or if you prefer I'll just leave the bubblegum vodka 0ut by the tree - just be sure to put the sleigh on auto or bring an elf along as a DD!

Love & Christmas Kisses!

Miss Amber Lane

The Champagne Life of a Princess

Ladies I must admit; I have champagne taste. I like the top brands of cosmetics and super lux handbags crafted with buttery leather. I like the first creamy taste of godiva chocolates and the touch of skilled hands on bare feet during a relaxing pedicure.

I also like to spoil myself with little treats throughout the day (especially on Mondays) to add a little glitz to the mundane.

Today my day started with this:


And this bouquet (as a gift to myself of course):


Then at lunch, instead of eating I went over to Borders and I picked up the December Lucky and Bunny Tales a tell-all memoir by a former girlfriend of HMH (Hugh M Hefner for those not in the know). I'm pretty sure I'm going to hate the self-proclaimed, "lawyer bunny" because of the dramz between her and HBK (Holly Bridget Kendra again for those not in the know)
but I can not wait to dig into the juicy bits of the Playboy Mansion!

The lifestyle infatuates me. Now I don't want to be an 80 something year old's gf- but 1,000 a week allowance and unlimited perks for no REAL work? Sold!

These small, but decadant little treats helped me to make it through another Monday as a working gal and I gotta admit; made my day just a little bit sweeter.

Alas, tomorrow there will be no treats for me- this lady has spent way too much money over the weekend and today so tomorrow this glitzy carriage turns back into a pumpkin.

This post reminds me so much of a book that I have read over and over again.

Its light and fluffy and "only meant for novelty" (or so my down to earth mother has said) but if you haven't read it yet,consider it recommended to you now:




"Francesca Castagnoli proves that the concept of being a princess is actually all about power, poise and self confidence and she argues that women need to take care of themselves to feel their best" - Amazon Review

Seriously girls- check this book out and get your highliter ready for the "Profashional" chapter. No working gal should set foot in her office without heeding the "sage" advice of this chapter!

Its all in good fun and I love it!

Well for now its off to watch last night's Dexter with the prince in my life.

I close this post by asking all of you: What little things do you do to treat yourself and to make you feel a little bit more like a princess during a regular old boring week?

The (ballroom) floor is yours....

Much Love,

Miss Amber Lane

Hangin Tough, Hangin Drunk

And the verdict is in.....

THE NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK CONCERT = to or > than AMAZING!!!

We had such a good time and I have to admit, I'm kind of bummed that its over. This morning when I crawled out of my hangover funk I got online just to see if they are going to be anywhere close to us again this summer.

They are...

Tonight in Indiana - unfortunately I will be unable to attend so I can only hope that they decide to tour again in the near future. I'm really hoping they'll decide to do it every summer... but who knows.

Anyway, on to the pictures!

So at the beginning of the night my hair and makeup looked like this:

I was paying tribute to Farrah Fawcett though you can't see it in this picture my hair was actually kind of flipped out and voluminous.

About 30 min. after getting to Riverbend my hair looked like this:

The humidity sucked the volume right out and I fuzzed up.

Another half hour later I looked like this:

I pretty much gave up and let it do what it wanted.

But at the end of the night... I looked like this:

Yikes! And I was clearly intoxicated.

Megan started the night out like this:


Pretty, cool, and collected

We had a couple glasses of wine and hopped into the car with New Kids On The Block in the CD player of course!


We're on our way!

We arrived and quickly made friends with our seat neighbors and had them take our picture... they liked us at first but I think we quickly became the people they'll tell their friends about, "The concert was awesome but we sat next to some fanatical, crazy, drunk girls"

What can ya do?

Take more pictures I say!

Here we are looking towards the stage - our seats were actually SO GOOD!


The Jabbawokees performed first. Gotta be honest we missed most of it - this is the very end

Then they took their masks off and their actually a group of pretty cute Asian guys


I didn't get a picture of their faces unfortunately.

Jesse Mcartney was up next: he was pretty good but we mostly used that time to take more pictures and get drink refills


When we got to our seats I heard my name being called from a few rows back and I turn to see Brittany and Holly.

Their a few rows back there. Its funny because I know Brittany from high school and Holly is a nurse where I work and their seats were right next to each other but they don't know each other at all!

Small world.

Then it was show time!!!!

There they are behind the screen!

Yay! My guys!!!

I have no idea what they opened with ... isn't that sad?

We were clearly super pleased with whatever it was they were singing

Jordan!!!
Jordan with Joey- swoon!
LOOOOOVE this picture - Joey was my fave as a little girl!

Then came the MJ tribute - this is the only (blurry) pic I have of that because I was too busy weeping (that's right I was weeping )

And Megan was busy making me take pictures of my weeping.

But then the most wonderful thing happened. I turned around and out of nowhere it was a New Kid invasion!!!
Donny so close I could spit and it would land on him!
I was tempted to climb over the partitioned area but decided 5 seconds of touching Donny wasn't worth getting ejected from the rest of the concert


Danny was over there to my left but look how everyones looking at Donny instead...poor Danny.

Then I realized I didn't have to stay in my seat there were other New Kids to see....

Namely Jon!!!

So I took off down the aisle....
I'm coming Jon!!!

That's what I'm talking about - I used to think Joey was the cutest now I definitely think its Jon!


Uhmmm is someone poking his goodies?

If so, he didn't seem to mind

The Jabbowokees came back and danced with Jordan

Do you believe he actually sang Give It To You? I know me neither.


Then there's cute Joey playing the piano - no idea what he sang - I just remember loving it!
Look at our hair!!! OH MY GOD!

We're clearly too busy swooning to care

I got a t-shirt I told Ben I'm wearing to bed everynight for the rest of my life!

All 5 of the guys!
Megan and her six inch button

Me and my six inch button, which I believe I lost at the bar afterwards.....boo!

Then came the beach balls and confetti. Megan lost her shit over the beach balls. Apparantly some girl snatched Megan's and they were about to go fist to cuffs over it. Drinks may or may not have been spilled/thrown and security may or may not have been involved. Its all a little fuzzy.

It rained confetti and I loved it!

Still swooning and singing at the top of our lungs! See my ticket smushed down the front of my dress? I needed it to be easily accessible just in case!

Getting close to the end....

Another wardrobe change for the boys

And their final bow.

It was an awesome show! It brought back so many memories and I'm so glad I finally got to see them live. If they come back again the only thing I'll do different is limit my gin and tonic intake a bit more - I mean it was still a blast but I would have a bit clearer of a memory about it had I not been trashed.

After the show we met our fiances at The Backdoor where drunken debauchery occured- then I went home with a splitting headache and slept until noon.

This weekend = success!