Thursday, September 17, 2009

A Girls Right To Toys


Disclaimer: I'm going to get mildly political and a tad personal - if you prefer the fluffier, lighter side of Miss Amber Lane- I would suggest skipping this post - if you feel up for a little bit of grit- by all means - I'm ready to share.

So....

Recently Alabama's ban on the public distribution of sex toys has slipped back into the limelight thanks to those wonderful people who are trying to have the supreme court overturn the law....
(due to how blatantly unconstitutional it all is ).

You can tell how news savvy I am by the fact that I had no idea there was EVER a ban on pleasure paraphernalia in the state of Alabama and its been a controversy since the late 90's.

You can certainly imagine how surprised I would have been had I ever been searching for a new "friend" (as my bff calls toys) while visiting the yellowhammer state (yes the name is ironic all by its lonesome).
You can also imagine my surprise that there is such a ban when you take in to consideration the pure debauchery I entangled myself with at the age of 19 when I visited Mobile for the GMAC bowl .... but that's another story for another day.

I digress.

It just blows my mind that the state can say- nope sorry we aren't going to sell these items to you- because the state thinks they're immoral, or dirty, or interfere with the sanctity of marriage or something. I just can't even fathom this. Why can't the laws that govern porn shops and love shacks in other states suffice in Alabama? No sale to minors ought to do the trick dontcha think?

And uhm...hate to break it to the conservative parents out there but taking the porn shop out of Mayberry isn't going to squelch the curiosity - only limit the the fodder. Where there is a Victoria Secret catalogue there will still be a horny preteen dying for a peek a nude statue a gaggle of girls giggling at a flacid penis. Furthermore - most kids will learn what buttons to push before they even know where there nose is. As human beings we are built to seek pleasure and seek it we will whether its with a Jenna Jameson film and a buzzing silver bullet or a Sears catalogue and a nubby towel. That's nature.

In my humble opinion if we didn't make everything remotely sexual in this country so taboo we wouldn't have all the deviance that we have today and we definitely wouldn't have kids who feel ashamed and embarrassed for feelings that are completely natural. Anybody else ever been convinced that you wouldn't go to Heaven? No? Only me?

In conclusion I have to say that technically, Alabama's ban has absolutely nothing to do with me; but with that being said: if there ever comes a day where I can't hop on the highway to my local Hustler and pick up a tingly,buzzy, buddy...I'm moving.

But this opinion comes from a girl who has her own subscription to Playboy and leaves them lying about the house, visitors be damned - so you can take my words at face value.

You can read a more eloquent version of the perspective I agree with here. I'm sure this has came across as a TMI ramble so I want to offer you a more fluid piece of literature to supplement.

In other news TGI Friday tomorrow.

And as always - I welcome your comments on the matter at hand whether in agreement or opposition.

After all; variety is the spice of life!

We now return you to your regularly scheduled Blonde Bride & Her Boo - the lighter, fluffier version ( ;

Much Love.....

Miss Amber Lane

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