That's my new mantra for the week.
I've been getting annoying calls, pretty much every night for 5 nights (and for the past several months more sporadically) from a private number. The caller at first would hang up immediately after I answered- as time has passed, they are now listening to me ask, "hello" until I finally hang up on them. If Ben answers they hang up immediately.
Who is this phantom caller?
Well, instinct tells me its the ex-troidanaire. I'm not going to grace the pages of this blog with stories about said ex - he's nearly ruined my perfectly happy existance on more than one occasion and suffice to say any attempt to reconnect is not for the greater good of the people. Does it make it any less creepy that it might be him?
Not so much. Its been over 5 years since our ultimate demise- with yes, an admitted blip last year when I thought it might be ok for us to try to be friends ( a blip I must say, that almost completely destroyed my relationship with Boo because I felt I couldn't be honest about it with him- LESSON LEARNED) there is no reason for him to be trying to contact me now- none- not even if he's heard of my recent engagement and has something to say- to which I must say if he does: there is ABSOLUTELY no excuse to call every night and never say anything- grow some balls, say it, and leave me alone.
The whole point of my saying all of this though - is that if it is him, I'm not going to try to decipher motives or be available to answer questions about my impending nuptuials. I'm so over what he thinks that its ridiculous. I spent many years worried about his thoughts and feelings and now I'm just MAD! Mad that every night while I lay in bed next to the man I love and who loves me like crazy, the man who tried his damndest to ruin several years of my life snakes his way in. Every late night ring of my phone cuts through the blissfulness of mine and Ben's life together and suddenly he's there too- even if he never says a word, even if its not really him. The moment my phone rings and the word: private appears, we both think of him hunkered down somewhere clutching his phone, deliberately reaching his controlling hands into our world: Amber and Ben's world, to twist his deceit into our hearts like a knife- and it just plain makes me mad!
Now, if its not him- then its really creepy- really, really creepy.
My instinct tells me it is though- and isn't instinct generally spot on?
I think so.
So, I'm not sure what to do at this point. Of course blogging doesn't fix the problem. I've already changed my number once and it was such a hassle I don't want to do it again. I've tried calling my provider to find out if they can decipher the number- of course not. I seek advice- what do ya'll think I should do?
Anyhow, as I've been saying in prior blogs: lots and lots of pictures to come- someday when I upload them! Also I promise to get back on point with my posts. What can I say, its spring and I'm restless. Stay tuned!
Miss Amber Lane
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